Posts tagged ‘Depression’

Sound of Joy

Sound of Joy

It’s like a sound of harvest in the fields
A song of food after famine
Just like the old good times of x-mas

Every part of me is happy

God mus be tickling me,
I got no reason to laugh
Yet am laughing
This feels good

All I want is to feels like this
everyday of my life!

By Beneth

June 21, 2010 at 2:23 PM Leave a comment

Back Online

Back Online

Every bad begaining
Has a chace to a good ending

God is not done with me yet
I would not want Him to stop either
I just need to trust him more

Same questions
Who am I today,
Where am I today,
And how am I today?

A reason for each piece of my life,
Say No to what the Lord says No to
And Yes to what he says Yes to

What about me?
It doesn’t matter
He knows better
So lets click next,
XOX am back online

By Beneth

June 21, 2010 at 2:19 PM Leave a comment

Getting on with Life

Getting on with Life

Life slips away if you don’t hold on it
You simply pass from one day to another
With no or less feeling of yourself

We all drop it at some point in life,
I have turned a new page,
For a new story,
For a new life

Am getting on with life,
So should you.

By Beneth

June 21, 2010 at 2:18 PM Leave a comment

God is working on me

God is working on me

Life used to be normal,
But now,
Everything is changing
And life is so challenging

God is still working on me,
With trying times,
It’s so hot in here,
The tests are no jokes,
and the purifying is not either.

General cleaning has never be easy,
It’s hard work,
It hurts, it’s painful,
Costly and it takes a lot of time.

And he is still going on
With his job.

I can’t wait to look at myself
Once he is done.
I know I will be shinning.

By Beneth

June 21, 2010 at 2:18 PM Leave a comment

Passing Time

Passing Time

May times when life gets tight
we chose to sit back
and believe time heals the damage.

My cousellor calls it wasting time,
I call it giving things time,

Fix it if you can,
If you can’t chill it,
I say fix it if you can’t
worry on how it will go

Why ask Gos’s help
And hold onto the problem
Release if you need help
Only cover to protect
& protect no damage

Pass no time,
Act on it,
With hands or prayer
Work upon it.

By Beneth

June 21, 2010 at 2:17 PM Leave a comment

My life

My life

Looking at this scroll of my life
Am impressed at the great things
I have done

However I close my eyes
at some scenes in my life
as shame swallows me

My counselor told me,
We all have ups and downs
Though there are those things
we never expect ourselves to do

Every little thing we have done,
We have lived,
We have learnt from it.
It has shaped us,
Be it good or bad,
Proud of or ashamed of it,
That is your life,
That is my life.

The past is gone,
The story still goes on,
We need to chose how it to ends
That is all I need to remember.

By Beneth

June 21, 2010 at 2:17 PM Leave a comment

Hating Self

Hating Self

Every wrong thing in my life,
Drains back to me,

I blame myself for lack of information,
Trusting easily, loving wrongly,
Hiding from the truth,
And under looking situations
I hate myself for this.

The sooner I get over this the better,
For no matter what,
I cannot avoid myself.

By Beneth

June 21, 2010 at 2:16 PM Leave a comment

Difficult Choices

Difficult Choices

Every time I chose to go ahead,
Another difficult choice is places before me

Sometimes I rely on myself to find a way out,
As things go on, they get harder, I seek your help.

How long will this go on?
Why can’t I rely on you all the time?

I have fallen many times,
Yet learnt nothing from any of them,

Help me to lean on you,
Go by your choices,
May be then,
I won’t be faced with difficult choices.

By Beneth

June 21, 2010 at 2:15 PM Leave a comment

Keep me from Ending

Keep me from Ending

My mother always asked me
to finish what I started,
With so many around me
I wish I had a software to delete
or stop all of the with one click

At times I wish I was younger,
For everyone to look at me as a kid,

At this point of depression, I feel may be,
This is where others chose to take their own lives…

Oh lord, Keep me from ending it,
I would like to live on,
See my children and grand children

By Beneth

June 21, 2010 at 2:14 PM 2 comments

Faint Hope

Faint Hope

It had been long
I have tried hard,
Yet no good has come out of it

I see trouble in every opportunity door
That opens before me

I know am not alone
Immersed in such feeling
I wish to find a way out.

It would be great
Helping my buddies swimming with me
From faint hope,
To greater hope,
Better life,
Better memories written

These tears won’t help,
They simply stain my face,
And tear my heart to pieces.

I need to be trough, even in tough times
Confront my fear, and hope on.

I need to survive this,
And encourage those behind me.

By Beneth

June 21, 2010 at 2:14 PM Leave a comment

Seeing a counselor

Seeing a counselor

Life has been mixed up like knots of spider threads
Forcing them to untie, tears them apart for ever

I need a hand in this,
Am seeing a counselor,

I feel so guilty to sit and start lamenting about my mess,
Cos I realize every mistake I made in front of this stranger.

It feels so stupid to tell your mess as though it’s a supper man’s story

“We all error in one way or the other”,
“nothing to be ashamed of… No one is perfect
The errors make us who we are,
Affecting us physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually…”

He comforts me,
To search for all the mess I think I have,
In each knot and untie them one by one…

If you,
Have no hope,
Have faint picture of the future,
Or don’t think you can recover from this
Or you wish you were not yourself,
Then we have work to do…
He conforms his position

I wonder,
Does he know what he is asking?
Some, I had accepted them as part of my life,

I know it’s painful going over these things once more…
It will take a lot of time from both of us…
But am willing to try

By Beneth

June 21, 2010 at 2:13 PM Leave a comment

Which Road?

Which Road?

Am standing at this cross junction
Wondering which road should I take?
Should I go straight through, left,
right or backwards?

Am scared of the unknown,
I want to go back…
It has been hard reaching here,
And doing it again is not easy for me…
And my fear is growing every day,

Dear Lord,
You’re the way,
The truth and light…

Show me you foot prints,
And in them I plant mine.

You promised never to leave me,
And I believe you won’t
Hold my hand, and lead me to where am supposed to be.

Lead the way LORD.

By Beneth

June 21, 2010 at 2:10 PM Leave a comment

Could this feeling be stopped?

Could this feeling be stopped?

My nights are spent in a dream land,
One dream after another

I feel something is wrong,
And needs to be set right

I feel, am locked up in a prison,
With no light dashing into my room

I feel trapped in a bubble
With less air for me to breathe

I feel am dying slowly,
With no priest around me to bless me as I take my last breath

I don’t know how to stop this,
But I wish I could stop this feeling.

This bitterness is killing me,
Could this feeling be stopped?

By Beneth

June 21, 2010 at 2:04 PM Leave a comment

Any Sunshine Ahead?

Any Sunshine Ahead?

Am stuck in a tunnel,
Filled with darkness,
As though death is around the corner.

It frightens me so much,
For I do not feel ready yet
to meet my creator.

A lot of work he gave me,
I have not done yet,
I cry for sunshine day in day out…

Am told,
One day in God’s kingdom is better than 1000 elsewhere…

But I don’t need only one day,
I need all the days with HIM
than 1 elsewhere…

Shine on me,
Shine for me…

If there is any sunshine ahead,
Lord let it shine for me.

By Beneth

June 21, 2010 at 2:04 PM Leave a comment

What Happened?

What Happened?

What happened to me?
I keep asking yet no one gives me the answer

Where did the jolly, fun , happy part of me go?
Did I lose myself along the way?
Or my days of happiness are finished?

Oh Lord, I hope not…
For I miss my self.

I look in the mirror,
And the reflection I get is a of a stranger

I can’t tell why she does what she does
For she never believed in them before

I wonder,
what happened?

I miss myself,
More than one will ever know…
I hope to meet you soon,
And then…
I will hold on you tight
never to lose you again.

By Beneth

June 21, 2010 at 2:03 PM Leave a comment

Hurting Inside

Hurting Inside

I hear myself crying
Screaming on top of my voice
Pouring my confused heart out

No one sees my wounds,
No one can tell how much pain
I’m crying within me.
And others continue to hurt me
Without knowing how deep
These wounds have grown.

I wonder,
Is God mad at me,
or HE feels my pain too?
Why is this happening to me?

Oh Lord, take me through this,
I know you know each byte of pain
I feel,
The tears I have shade,
And each word I have said
you have heard,

And when my day comes,
You will lift me up to my seat to glorify your name.
I pray I live to see that day come by

By Beneth


June 21, 2010 at 2:03 PM 2 comments

Searching for Answers

Searching for Answers

I have tried not to grumble
Though with no success

I have tried a soul search
Yet got nothing

I languish every day in emptiness
In a fight to get answers
To all the questions in my heart …

I want to know what happened, when and how…
I feel helpless yet bitter at myself

With a feeling of guilt with no clear accusation
Something must have gone wrong at some point

I hope to know soon,
And hopefully to solve the problem soon.

By Beneth

June 21, 2010 at 2:02 PM Leave a comment

Why Me?

Why Me?

Taking time
Reviewing the life I have lived
Counting blessings, achievements,
Losses and profits made
Going through everything one by one

The losses beat everything else,
Sad moments define my life style
One question remains unanswered;
Why me?

Did I forsake God?
Did he forget me?
Did I forget to ask him?
Why me?

I feel Crashed,
Physically and mentally,
And life feels hapless…

Oh Jesus,
I seek your comfort
Be with me now
And lead me through these
Days of tough times,
And sort with me these issues in my life.

By Beneth


June 21, 2010 at 2:01 PM Leave a comment

You’re Welcome

On this blog you will find poems, songs, stories and articles about the bible teachings, family and marriage, nature, jokes, soaps, work, our low moments (like confessions, disappointments, depression, stress) and of cause those thing that keep us going(like inspirations, dreams, friends, relationships, love).

I appreciate every single visit you make, and I believe that you and I can make this site livelier.

Thank you.
& come again.


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About Me*

My name is Beneth Musiime Akoola, simple and very Imaginative.

I don't like crowds. However when it gets to online, i just want to talk to every one.

Am shy with new faces but those who get to know me, they will tell you am very talkative.

This blog is just another part of me, that likes 'telling' others whatever is on my mind.

Well that is me.
I look forward to know you!


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